I’m sick of ME!

Father in Heaven, I ask You Lord to coat these words with Your paint so as to cover the flaws my words show. In Jesus name, Amen.


Well Well, here we are just one week before Christmas. Yikes! Honestly it has flown up on me way to quickly. I don’t feel like I have been able to just observe and enjoy all the festivities this holiday has to offer. The Hallmark movies, the baking, the endless mugs of hot coco.


I took on making holiday throw pillows this year and decided to put them up for sale. I really had no idea that they would end up being so popular! I’ll get a  jump on it much sooner next year for sure.


My in-home book club just finished a book that we’ve been reading for a few months. This is also why things have been a little harry too, I wanted to finish this book before Christmas so everyone could have the time off and not worry about squeezing one more thing in.


So this will be a little plug for this particular book. We read and studied “Sick of Me” by Whitney Capps. It’s a book that in a summed up version, invites the reader to not just stop at recognizing the “broken” areas of our lives, but to also move into the sanctification process. Allowing God to work on that brokenness if you will.


This is something that has hit home for me because I’m very good at confessing and being transparent. But exercising real change… not so much.


Change is uncomfortable and messy. I typically want familiar and easy. How about you?


I don’t want to want the easy and familiar anymore. This is the key I have discovered in change. We don’t, by nature, usually like change. We are creatures of habit. So therefore we must ask God for the desire to change the habits we know need changing.


Paul says in Romans 7:15, “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.”


This is very much how I feel every time I say “I’m not going to say this, do that, think the worst… ”


My very desire to want to change those habits has to come from God, so doesn’t it stand to reason that we should ask Him for that desire?


Many people now a days will agree that there is nothing magical about January first. By this they mean there is no real reason to wait until then to begin again with a new goal.


Having said that, I do think there is a mind set that goes along with “new year, new you” kind of concept. New beginnings bring fresh goal setting.


Though I will be asking God to plant the desire in my heart now to want a change in behavior or habit, I will be more focused on it at the beginning of the new year. I want to assume the best about others just as I want them to assume the best about me. I want to have a more positive attitude about people and events. I don’t want to have anymore room in my life for negativity and downers. I have put up some boundaries in this area but I need more bricks and mortar.


I desire to have the heart of God. The fruits of the spirit! Joy, love, peace, patients, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. Honestly, there are a couple of these that are not my strong points. I struggle with patients and self control.


But I want to desire to have A L L of the fruits. Because truly… I’m “Sick of Me”. I don’t want to just recognize my brokenness, no… I want to let God do His miraculous work in me and let others see that work. Not for my sake, but so they can feel like God can do it for them too!


I really enjoyed this book by Whitney and I think if you are looking for something that takes your spiritual growth to the next level, you’ll enjoy it too.


I will be taking next week off for the Christmas celebrations my family has but I’m sure I’ll be popping into your in-box between Christmas and new years.


From the bottom of my heart and the center of my table I wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas and I pray you have comfort and joy. My love to all of you!!!


3 thoughts on “I’m sick of ME!

  1. Merry Christmas Sweet Friend! I, too, feel like Christmas has come quickly and I haven’t gotten enough done BUT my family and our community took a hit from a tornado Monday evening. My mother in law’s home (where we were when it hit) is a total loss. But, oh, our God has been so incredibly good to us through all of this-we are so thankful to still be alive and for simple pleasures like friends who bring flashlights to share in the total darkness that followed, gas heat when there is no power, and friends and strangers who show up with power saws and generators, garbage bags, and groceries. The outpouring of love and random acts of kindness we are witnessing declare God’s love and His mercy. So our Christmas to do list may never be completed this season, but our hearts are so full and so thankful for JESUS, our Messiah, our Mighty God, our Counselor, and Prince of Peace. He is FAITHFUL. Merry Christmas to all!


    1. Oh Tonya… I am just so sorry! I’m sending you a great big hug right now! Perhaps your to-do list has been completed. Maybe your list this year only needed one thing on it. To see God in action through the out pouring of love from friends and strangers. You my friend, have had a terrible loss happen, but have been able to witness the hand of God moving. That is the greatest gift of all. I will say a prayer for you and your family for strength and recovery. Blessings to you sweet friend. xoxo


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