Do Not Resuscitate?

       Oh my goodness… I’m so sorry for the lack of our Wednesday post and our message for Monday post. There had been some changes done on my website and I couldn’t figure out how to do my posting! My husband had been out of town so I didn’t have any other working eyes to look at it and see what was going on. I sincerely apologize! I kind of feel like I stood you up for our dates but please know I really wanted to show up. I hope it is taken care of now and I’ll be on track again.

       Well get comfy and we’ll get chatting. Got your coffee or tea or cider? It’s getting to be that time of year! Grab a doughnut or danish or some toast and settle in.

       About twelve years ago, I had one of the scariest moments of my life. We lived in a small ranch style home that had a gally kitchen. This is the kind of kitchen that you can get to from either side. It’s open all the way around. There was a wall separating the Livingroom from the kitchen and the hallway leading to the bedrooms was off the kitchen. (There is a point to giving the lay out of the house, I promise)

       One evening, like so many, I had gone to bed before my husband as he is a bit more of a night owl then me. It wasn’t uncommon for me to already be asleep when he came to bed. But one such evening proved to be most uncommon.

       It was completely dark in the room and hallway so I knew when my phone rang, it was well beyond the time to receive phone calls. Still in a sleep induced stupor, I groped for my cell phone and it dawned on me that it was my husbands specified ring tone piercing the dark. Confused and half asleep, I answered the ringing with one hand and reached over to his side of the bed with the other. He wasn’t there. What in the world!

       Hearing a muffled moaning on the other end of the line, I quickly threw the covers back and began making my way down the hall. Turning into the Livingroom, I turned on a light. He wasn’t there. Phone still in hand and still hearing the muffled moaning, I rounded the corner to the other side of the kitchen. Flipping on the kitchen light, I saw the reason for the call.

       My husband lay face down on the tile floor with one arm stretched slightly above his head and his smart phone lay face up just inches from his hand.

       Mindlessly throwing my phone on the table, I knelt beside him and tried waking him. He was unresponsive. Just the terrible moaning. I couldn’t remember where I tossed my phone and I didn’t know as of yet how to use a smart phone. By this time my daughter, who was all of seven, had gotten out of bed and observed the scene at hand. Calm as could be she took her fathers phone and opened it to call 911. I was eternally grateful for my young child knowing how to operate a smart phone; I wouldn’t always remain so grateful as they got older and got their own phones however, wink.

       The dispatcher who answered my call said the routine script of “911, what is your emergency?”

What exactly was my emergency? My husband was unresponsive, and I have no idea what had happened. This was what I recited mechanically while continuing to try and rouse my husband. The minutes ticked by with a hollow echo from the clock seeming to mock my anxiety.

       The EMT personnel arrived and I stepped only two spaces back from the man who held the other half of my heart. Thinking about my two young kids standing in the hall watching this “only in the movies” scene taking place before them, I told my son to call his Grandmother and see if she could come over to stay with them while I went to the hospital. He had told me that he already called and both Grandparents were on their way. Praise the Lord for quick thinking little minds. The Grandparents pulled in and the ambulance carrying my husband in the back with two attending EMT’s, the driver, and myself. There had been no alert responses from my husband, and he continued the strange moaning he had been doing all along. I prayed silently for him and for the team tending to him.

       It went silent in the back of the ambulance as my husband suddenly stopped the vocal crackling. The next words I heard made my heart skip a beat.

“Okay, let’s not dilly-dally, let’s get there.” I didn’t have to see monitors or blood pressures or thermometers to know it wasn’t going well. I willed the driver to put his foot heavy on the gas and he did in fact pick up speed. I prayed, they scrambled, and everything was seeming to move in slow motion. I flashed on the scenes from emergency shows and the phrase “Do Not Resuscitate” blinked in my passing imagination. I knew my husband didn’t have “DNR” on his license so I’m not sure why I flashed on that. But I knew I wanted every Doctor in the hospital to pound on his chest if that’s what it took!

       Standing outside his curtained room, I could hear him saying something but couldn’t fully make it out. “She’s here, she’s here… she’s just outside your room right now.” I heard his nurse soothing him. Oh dear God, he’s calling for me and I can’t be with him…

       I’ll continue this story next week and I hope you all will join me at the table for that. Please feel free to invite friends to our gathering here and we’ll get more chairs. There’s room for everyone! See you next week friends.   

Whose package is this?

Hello everyone!Welcome to my table.. If you’ve never been here before, I’d like to welcome you with a big smile and a warm virtual hug! I’m going to ask you to come on an imaginary journey with me in this post so i want you to really try and envision the sceen going on here okay? Here we go…


Have you ever seen a package sitting on a desk at work or in a foyer at church and wondered “whose package is this?” Maybe you wondered if it was for you? You kind of look around to see if anyone is coming to take the package to deliver it. Maybe you’re asking other people if they know who it belongs to. You may even carry it with you from place to place asking if it is this person or that persons package. Now your curiosity is at an all-time high. You have turned the package over and over looking for a name tag but you can’t find one. Hmm, who could this belong to? Surely that person is expecting it but how do you get it to them when you don’t know whose it is? You examine the mysterious package once again looking for any indication of who it is addressed to. Somehow you see a tag that you are sure was not there before. You lift the tag and read the name…To: Jesus. Huh? It’s… to Jesus? How in the world do you deliver this one? You look up to heaven and ask “Lord what is this?”, “Open it.” You seem to hear. Taking the package to a private corner, you sit down on the floor and begin the curious unveiling. Slowly you peel off the wrapping and open the box. There are several folded pieces of paper. You remove one and unfold it. Your eyes widen. On the paper is a struggle that you have been having, maybe with your spouse or kids. You remove another paper. This one is the financial worries you’ve had. Another… the contemplation of seeking a new job. Still another… the disagreement you had with someone at church and how you should handle it.

But who… how could someone know about these things? You’ve told no one. After removing and reading all the slips of paper, you sit there, legs folded underneath you, package on the floor in front of you, slips of paper beside you. Then you realize that you have indeed told no one, not even Jesus. This package was for Jesus containing all “your” concerns, worries, and cares. “Cast your cares upon Him, for He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5;7.

So, you have now found out who this package belongs to, it belongs to Jesus. All of our cares and worries, He wants us to give them to Him. No one who gives a package to someone with their name on it will then expect it to be returned to them. Put all your concerns in a box, close the lid, seal it up, put Gods name on the tag and then give it to Him. Oh, and don’t ask for it back, after all, His name was on the tag.

A Message for Monday

Hi all and good Monday morning. I pray you all had a restful or at least peaceful weekend. Have you ever wondered about God’s timing in any particular situation? Maybe questioning why God put you somewhere in a specific season of life? Perhaps in the life of someone else at a particular time of their life?


I have a verse for you about this…


Ester 4:14 says “For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place but you and your father’s house will parish, and who knows if you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (ESV)


We do not know God’s timing in certain plans, but all we need to know is that He has a plan. Just because we can’t see the why’s and when’s, doesn’t mean there isn’t any. God sees all outcomes and He knows when we are to be there and why. Trust Him that He has a purpose for why you are where you are! Bloom where you are planted my friend. Have a blessed Monday.

The Other Woman

Father in Heaven, may these words be felt and heard in the manner that You’ve intended. Father let this message be relatable and honest and real. In Jesus name, Amen.


Come on in friends! Have a seat at the table and get comfy. I’d like to have an honest discussion about something I struggle with. I wrestle with “the other woman”. I can’t seem to measure up to her.


She’s kinder then me, she’s more cheerful then me, she’s even better with my kids and husband then I am. I can’t hold a candle to her.


She’s a better friend, sister, mother, daughter, wife… why she’s even a better homemaker and cook then me. How do I compete with that?


Who is this other woman you may ask? Who is it that has out-done me?


It’s the woman who lives in my head.


You may know her too. She’s the “Caroline Ingalls” that we have all longed to be at one point or another. Well I’ve longed to be her for many years. Most of you may remember that I shared my Little House on the Prairie obsession. I still watch it to this day and I’ve been watching since I was about fourteen years old. When I was old enough to be contemplating marriage and children, I fantasized about being Caroline Ingalls.


She always knew the right advice to give her children at every stage of life. She always had a lovely smile for Charles when he returned home at the end of a hard work day. She always had a meal ready and she kept an orderly household. She prayed and read her Bible. She baked, she sewed, she chopped wood for crying out loud!


Now I’m not going to go chop down the nearest Red Wood to try and keep up but Caroline could do it all! She knew when to speak and when not to. She brought a meal to a neighbor in need. Well… you get the idea.


When my husband comes home from a hard day, I’ve played out the Caroline scenario in my mind. He would walk in the door and I would be there to say “welcome home honey.” Dinner would be just about finished and the house would be peaceful. Enter reality stage left… he gets home and it’s the dog who greets him first. I’m behind in dinner prep from spending too much time on the phone trying to answer questions and listen to a friends dilemma or lost track of time checking Emails or any number of things.


he gets a glance and a “hey” for his troubles. The dog gives him a better greeting.


My kids are adults now and Caroline would transition beautifully, guiding them from her endless fountain of wisdom filled upbringing, into her years of stepping back and letting her children learn life as an adult with one hundred percent confidence in how she raised them. My children get repeated instructions on things I’ve already said a million times. My transition looks more like still trying to make them hear my advice and council even when they didn’t ask for it because, ya know… they need it anyway.


I won’t bore you with all the ways I fall short of my Caroline Ingalls image. But her soft spoken, gentle, trusting, wise ways still remain on my perfect woman’s bucket list.


Proverbs 31:10 “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.” (ESV)


Proverbs 31:28 “Her children rise up and call her blessed, her husband also and he praises her.” (ESV)


That… that is the other woman I desire to be. I desire it with all my heart. I have the right words, actions, facial expressions, clothing, affections… completely played out in my mind, then this unrecognizable woman shows her unwanted self right in the middle of my Little House scene.  Oh I just want to call for a “CUUUUTTTT!” and begin again.


Have you ever felt like this?


I have been reminded so much these last few weeks about how our words affect people, especially our own families. We have the ability to lift them up to mountain tops or shove them down into the valley. I want my husband and children to rise up and call me blessed. I want to be that wife who is more precious then jewels. It’s a path God is leading me on and I’m so thankful for this fact… it’s never too late!


We can start right now to strive to be the person God has created us to be and as long as we still draw breath, it’s not too late. Isn’t that glorious news?


Dear readers, God is simply waiting for our “go ahead” to lead us. He’ll never force us but lead us with those gentle hands of a good Father. Place your hand in His and I’ll do the same and let’s begin the walk together.


A Message for Monday

Good Monday to all of you! Thanks for being here at the Monday breakfast table for a bight of spiritual food to start your day. This is on prayer… which is going to be the theme for my social media posts this week. If you haven’t followed me on Facebook or Instagram, go ahead and jump on over there and join those families as well.


Here’s our bight…


Acts 1:13 – 14 “and when they had entered, they went up to the upper room where they were staying, Peter and John and James and Andrew, Phillip and Thomas, Bartholomew and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus and Simon the Zealot and Judas the son of James. All these with one accord were devoting themselves to prayer together with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus and His brothers.” (ESV)


Did you notice the key point in these verses? They were praying “with one accord”. In other words… they were unified in their prayers. They had one unified mission and they joined in prayer and agreement for that mission. Hmm, seems like we could use that in our world today huh?


But we could form a small prayer group to be unified in prayer. Grab two or three or more people who are prayer warriors and plan a time to pray together. This might be a phone or zoom situation, or if it’s a small group, meet in each others homes as you are comfortable.


Prayer is powerful and we should use this weapon against the enemy as often as we can. I’d love to hear if you have plans to form a prayer group  like we see in these verses. Blessings to you all!

This Doesn’t Fit Right

Father in Heaven, may the words You’ve given me be written and understood just the way You want them to be. I pray this faulty human instrument can be used for Your honor and glory. In Jesus name, Amen.


Hi all. Welcome back to the table. Have you ever gotten a gift at Christmas or a birthday that was an article of clothing? Have you ever had to return it? Perhaps it wasn’t the right color for your complexion. Maybe it wasn’t your style. Maybe it was the wrong size.


I’ve gotten items that weren’t the right size and tried to wear them anyway because I didn’t want the giver to feel bad for selecting the wrong thing. It might have been too small or it might have been too big, either way, I attempted to sport it proudly. But usually the giver would notice the article and comment something like this:


Oh I see you are wearing that shirt! Um, I think they had other sizes.


Oh that jacket looks great! Lot’s of room in there to wear a couple of shirts if you get cold.


Oh I love the way those pants look, I didn’t know they were crop pants.


Well, I suppose the giver doesn’t want to hurt feelings either.


So it’s important to keep receipts I guess. It has taken some time to realize that I don’t have to walk around wearing something that doesn’t fit when there is another size that will fit. I simply have to thank my generous gift giver for the lovely item and ask if they had other sizes as I want to display it’s beauty in the proper way.


I then get the right size or if needed, another item that’s similar, and put it on to better carry myself. If the article fits well, we feel more able to wear it proudly and walk with confidence.


You know we see this very situation in the Bible? No really… it’s there! Let’s look at this section…


1 Samuel 17:38 – 39 “Then Saul clothed David with his Armour, he put a helmet of bronze on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail, and David strapped his sword over his Armour and he tried in vain to go for he had not tested them then David said to Saul ‘I cannot go with these for I have not tested them’ so David put them off.” (ESV)


Saul gave David the “go ahead” to fight the Philistine, but wanted him to put on his own Armour. David was rather short in stature and Saul was rather tall. This cumbersome ensemble was not easily worn even if it fit well. Saul’s Armour was far too big for David to wear properly and have it be functional for him. He clunked around a bit and decided it wasn’t going to work after all. David decided instead to go forth as he had done in the past with what God equip him with.


You see friends, we cannot clunk around with the worlds protection, AKA Armour, and expect it to fit us well. We can only put on the Armour that was made for us… the full Armour of God (Ephesians chapter 6  ). This is the protection that we need. This is the clothing that fits us best.


We need not try and make the worlds Armour fit right, we need to exchange it for the right size. Jesus size. God knows what size you are and His Armour fits the best! You can read about the full Armour of God in the above passage. Oh and God already has the receipt for the worlds ill fitting Armour on file… He’ll exchange it no questions asked… even after ninety days!







A Message for Monday

Good morning all and I hope you had a wonderful weekend! Something has been on my heart lately… it’s how I use my words. I’d like to share this verse with you to start the week with…


Isaiah 50:4 “The Lord God has given me, his servant, the tongue of disciples as one who is taught that I may know how to sustain the weary with a word. He awakens me morning by morning, He awakens my ear to listen as a disciple as one who is taught.”


This prompts my heart to listen well for someone who needs an encouraging word in due season. Most especially my loved ones. I can often walk right by the ones I love most and not have an uplifting word even if they don’t express that they need one. A thoughtfully placed word is never spoken at a wrong time.


Food for thought today. Be blessed and speak that word of encouragement to someone today!

Are you on your way home?

Father in Heaven, may these words come directly from You and be received in the manner that You intend. In Jesus name, Amen.


Hi all! Grab your seat at the table and let’s chat.


When my kids began driving, I wanted them to text me when they reached their destination so I could rest easy knowing they were alright. Now this didn’t necessarily include the short trips just down the street, but more about the ones that would take more then say twenty minutes to get there.


I know this has probably been a little over the top but it keeps me sane! Being blind, I can’t just jump in the car and rush off if, God forbid, something happened. I know there are apps to track where people are now but again, they don’t really work for me. So we agreed that this was a reasonable option. It doesn’t really apply anymore with my son since he is living on his own now. However, we do like him to text if he were to go out of town.


Well even though my daughter is almost nineteen, she drives about thirty minutes to work so I still like for her to text me when she gets there and when she is on her way home.

(side note) A few weeks ago she texted that she was on her way home and the time she should have been home came and went. forty minutes… fifty minutes… one hour… yeah, we began to panic. She wouldn’t answer her phone even after multiple calls from both her father and myself. Then we heard a flight for life helicopter fly over coming from the direction she would have been coming from. Full on fright set in now and we got in the car to trace her trail. About half way towards her work place, she called me back. “I forgot my phone was on silent!” she yelped knowing we were likely to be upset. “My co-workers and I got to talking and lost track of time.”

Both anger and relief swept over her father and I. Turning around, we went home and just a bit later, our daughter arrived at home.


The fear we felt was real and this is why, we explained to her again, why we like for her to text when she is on her way. She understood and after all emotions were settled, we called it a night.


The text we ask our daughter to give us is that steadfast reminder that she is indeed on her way home. Safely within the protection of her father’s and my care. She keeps connected to her parents by letting us know she is on her way home.


Have you texted your Father to keep in touch and let Him know you are on your way home? Have you been in connection with Him?


2 Corinthians 5:1 “For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands eternal in the heavens.” (ESV)


When we stay connected with our heavenly Father, we have this promise. No matter what happens here to our earthly home, we have one already prepared for us in heaven. One that can’t be destroyed. It’s made by the master carpenter Himself. We can pray and read God’s word and follow the plans He has for our lives, then have the assurance that we are on our way home.


Seeking God first is our text to let our Father know that we are still on our way home. This world is not our final destination. We have an eternal sin free home awaiting us and we are just on the journey to get there. Keeping in touch with our Father to let Him know we are on our way home is a delight to Him. Keep texting Him (AKA – praying, reading, doing).


I long for the day when I no longer have to “text” God, but to walk and talk with Him face to face. My daughter often says she’d rather talk to us about anything, face to face. How about you? Will you “text” God and let Him know you are on your way home? Are you looking forward to the day you can see Him face to face?





A message for Monday

Good Monday morning to you! I hope the sun is shining where you are. I have this passage I want to share with you today…


Romans 8:24-25 “For in this hope we were saved, now hope that is seen is not hope, for who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.” (ESV)


Have you ever been on a job interview and immediately got offered the job? You would no longer hope that you get it. You already know it’s yours. But if you have to wait for a given amount of time, then you have hope that you get it.


We demonstrate our hope in the Lord by having patience and trust in His plans. We show that trust by simply waiting for Him to carry them out and not trying to manufacture our own results. Pray for the patience to wait and keep your hope in Christ alive!


Blessings friends and have a great week!

Back to our regularly scheduled program…

Father in Heaven, may these words serve to witness and glorify Your name. In Jesus name, Amen.


Well hello everyone! Though I will still be continuing to work on my book, I’ll be able to get back on track with posting now. Thank you so much for allowing me this wonky posting schedule… or lack of a schedule. I’d like to fill you in on how the conference was if I may?


The first day of the conference was kicked off by my publisher meeting at 9:30 a.m. I was quite nervous but prayed for God’s peace to wash over me. As soon as the meeting began, the agent I met with, Judy, made me feel much more relaxed. She was very down to earth and relatable. Taking my first mental note of the day, I wanted to remember how she interacted with me so I could interact with people in the same gentle manner.


Our conversation went from ministry to my book subject in just a few minutes. When preparing for this meeting, I followed all the instructions of what was needed for this time. Focusing completely on the items requested, I didn’t write a book proposal. Now who comes to a publisher meeting without a book proposal right? Well in the writing world, I’ve learned you are too follow the instructions the publisher gives and nothing more. So I back burnered the proposal for now.


However, after asking me to put the purpose and desire of my book into a verbal context, per her request, she asked me the million dollar question… “Do you have a book proposal?”


It honestly felt like the kiss of literary death. I paused for only a moment and she picked up on my hesitation. “Um… no, actually I… I… was focused on the one sheet for our meeting and…” I stammered.


Judy was very gracious and understanding. She said it was no problem that I didn’t have it ready right now and offered to Email me a book proposal check list. I greedily accepted her offer. In the Email correspondence she told me to feel free to submit my proposal to her. Whaaaaaat? Did I seriously just get a second chance to submit my proposal? Yes… Yes I did. Praise God!


This doesn’t mean a contract of course, but it’s a good sign when an agent wants the proposal. So guess what I’ll be working on? However I won’t have to break from posting here. I’ll be offering some snip-it’s from the book and I’m going to work on a ten day devotional for my awesome readers.


As for the conference itself? Well it was amazing! Even though it had to be virtual this year, it was a beautiful medley of spiritual women coming along side other women to walk with them a little on this writing and speaking journey. I felt so spiritually fed and nourished. I have a much more focused and clear vision for my calling. I know my message in this season of life. I also learned that my message will change according to that season of life I may be in.


I have a strong hearts desire to share this message of brokenness and redemption. Not just healing and moving past or learning to live with our hurts, but to see them in a whole new polished purposeful light. I can’t wait to see how God weaves these pieces together and create a ministry that He is leading.


Whether it’s on a page or a stage, I want to minister to other women who feel forever broken with no real purpose. Is that you? Do you feel like your hurts and brokenness is in vain? May I walk beside you in this journey if even only for a few miles?


I’ll be seeking to expand my speaking opportunities when that’s possible again. I feel so on fire for this and I am thankful to have all of you on this journey.


Please please let me know of your felt needs and how I can better serve you. That’s my desire… to serve my readers. After all… we should be served while sitting around the table, right? Blessings to you all! See you soon!